Yay finally ended ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ
This is an alternative story I came out with after I had watched seasons 4, 5 & 6. Dean seams so selfish to me - he never thanks anybody for saving his sore ass so I thought that Cas could get enough at some point ‘cause he sacrificed many things for him ヽ(；▽；)
Comics is originally A4 but its size doesn’t fit tumblr so I needed to cut it in pieces (๑◕~ ◕๑)
Years passed. That’s the funny thing about time. It keeps marching on, even when you don’t.
He drank. He fought. He hunted. That was his life.
Sam left, eventually. He went to back to college. He called Dean from time to time. It always went to voicemail. A few hours later, he would receive a message from Dean. It always said the same thing.
"On a hunt."
He never said he was okay. They both knew that was a lie.
It was the alcohol in the end. He’d fallen so far as to have been drinking on a hunt. It was a bottle of vodka and a lone vampire and a piece of shattered glass. The vamp ran, fueled by fear and rumors from a time when Dean Winchester was protected by an angel.
As for Dean, he knew the wound was fatal as soon as he hit the ground.
Don’t ask for help. Don’t pray to me. Don’t call my name.
Well, Dean thought uselessly. I’m dead in a few minutes, so what does it matter?
Dean sighed. No use hiding it now.
I’m sorry. The truth is that I was a selfish dick. I’m still a selfish dick. I was scared, and I was…
He stopped. And then he wanted to hit himself. He was dying, what the fuck did it matter now?
I was in love. With you. And being a selfish dick made it easier.
He gritted his teeth against the pain.
I know you told me not to pray to you, and I never did. Never. Not once. But now I figure that this is my last chance to break that rule.
I loved you. I think I still might…yeah. I love you.
He laughed bitterly, wincing as it turned into a choked cough.
I’m dying, Cas. Funny, I always thought that when I died I’d have a gun in my hand and Sam at my back.
I don’t deserve shit from you, Cas. But can you tell Sam? That I’m dead. He was always a better person than I was, and maybe…maybe if you can’t answer me, you can answer him.
And so he’d broken the rules. He’d prayed to him. He’d asked for help. And now there was just one rule left to break.